What is it that makes young people behave the way they do?

Is it something they learn from their peers, parents or television? Do you believe they are searching daily to discover who they are or what they want to become? Basically, the way people react to them is based on how they present themselves.

Adolescents create their own self-image.

Young people make daily decisions about how they dress, talk and walk. They consciously decide who they befriend, who they date and where they “hang out.”

Moreover, they make critical decisions about whether to break the law, drink alcohol or respect others. If wise choices are not made, negative consequences can follow and teenagers must be willing to accept responsibility for their actions.

Since we live in a world where people are constantly making judgments, it is imperative that we set good examples. Unfortunately, sometimes genuine people present themselves in a manner that is misleading to others. For example, some people appear confident and proud, yet deep inside they are feeling insecure and uncertain. People who lack confidence in themselves sometimes appear as bullies, jocks or drama queens. The role they play sends a mixed message to others, and ultimately they feed on what others think of them.

If teenagers are behaving as ‘goody-two-shoes,’ they put a great deal of pressure on themselves to do everything right. This type of person is not to be confused with one who is genuinely moral. A ‘jock’ is a person who doesn’t care as much about friends as he does about teammates. The relentless “whiner” is one complains about many things and whatever is wrong is never his or her fault. The ‘drama queen’ doesn’t live an ordinary life. Many events in life are extremely exaggerated.

When thinking about your own self-image, what kind of integrity do you convey to others? Do people view you as someone sincere and kind, or do they perceive you as a gossip or trouble-maker? Many young people tend to behave in the same manner as their friends. They love the feeling of “fitting in” with the crowd.

Unfortunately, many adolescents approach friendships the wrong way, by dipping into the latest “gossip.” They are continuously observed whispering and sharing information with others that may not even be true.

Successful people are not confused about their identity. They are aware of their attitude, their appearance and their behavior toward others. They make a point to treat others the way they wish to be treated.

If you are responsible for your experiences in life, then make wise decisions and take a lead role in what you say, who you spend quality time with and what actions you take in regard to the situations in life that you can control. Set realistic, obtainable goals and ‘run’ toward things in life that will make you feel proud, happy and successful. If you have trouble setting goals or overcoming obstacles in life, seek help from resources that can assist you in reaching your greatest potential to achieve your dreams.

Think about people who seem successful to you and investigate what their secrets might be that allowed them to conquer their expectations. Hold yourself accountable for living a lifestyle that depicts high standards and few excuses.

Great rewards follow those who display good character!

Dr. Sonya Rogers is a certified counselor who lives in Daphne.