Konnichiwa, minna-san. Yokosou kono matsuri (h)e.

Mandatory Japanese aside, we, the class of 2008, thank you for coming to this, the commencement of our lives outside of Bayside.

This ceremony represents not the end of our days as Baysiders, but instead the transition to Bayside alum, a rank truly worth coveting.

For these past four years, we have been given a safe, stable haven to develop and grow as individuals, but that ends today. The real world awaits, full of trials and tribulations to be overcome, as well as wonderful new experiences beyond our current scope of perception. Regret not and worry not about the trials — they will come — but we have already overcome so much, even within this precious shelter. We graduated from the 12-step program to senior privileges after all; not to mention managing to live together in Pine Mountain without any fatalities — a great feat, considering our size.

Individually we have accomplished more amazing things than there is time to recount, but I’ll give a short list anyways, and have to ask for the forgiveness of anyone whose contributions just didn’t fit. We have excelled in sports and academia, service projects and environmental activism, faith-based programs as well as beauty pageants and even Equestrian training. So, what can’t we overcome? Probably just our tendency to be hyperactive, stubborn and procrastinating, but even those traits can become positive assets. The stubbornness to have something proven to oneself before believing in its truth will lead us away from the snares of disinformation so rampant in this new age of interconnectivity, where most of our news comes to us without sources, and rarely with an editor. The ability to distinguish the truth, derived from our stubbornness, is invaluable now that valid and false information are routinely given side by side. Our class might actually be able to make some use out of Wikipedia. Our hyperactivity may also serve us well, if we manage to tailor it to our surroundings. The novelty of a different way of thinking can be the difference between the success and failure of any project.

We don’t have to learn to think outside the box; we are there looking in, helping those who are bound by the limitations of conventional superstition. We are the type of class, who, when told to put a square peg in a round hole will either: defiantly rage against the preposterousness of the situation, or will simply, quietly fetch a nice, round peg for the job. I am proud to be the voice of such a class, and know that great things will become of us.

Minna-san, doumo arigatou gozaimashita, soretomo, watakushi no tomo, omedetou. Thank you, and you’ve earned it.

Now we must go and put into action what we have learned. It is time to make the world a better place, and repay our collective debt to society tenfold.