I have gotten much mail and many comments on the column I wrote concerning the importance of saying “thank you.” I have received many requests and suggestions to write about various aspects of etiquette, and I have debated doing so, but the tragedy in Japan has caused me to end the debate.

The Japanese are suffering and the world has come to their aid. That is as it should be. We are all of the same community, so when one hurts, we all hurt.

The U.S. 7th Fleet, with its two carriers and numerous other assets, has provided food, medical supplies, fresh water, electricity and troops on the ground to aid in the task. The Fleet wasn’t asked to do so; they saw the need, asked permission and went to work. That is what a neighbor should do. That is the world community.

We can learn a lesson. True service is not a duty or an obligation, although service is done in the name of both. True service is not mandated or assigned. It goes much deeper than that. It is a thing of the heart.

I had a friend who taught me this lesson. His wife was in the hospital, his mother died and the family was under stress as he juggled responsibilities and the care of four children. I went over to offer my condolences on his loss and asked the standard question for these situations, “John, is there anything I can do?”

His answer shakes me still. “If you love me, you will know what I need, and do it.” He didn’t smile when he said it, but it wasn’t hateful, or demanding either. He was saying, there is so much, just look around and pick something.

In response, I recruited my wife to take on the children. I got some men from our church to come and mow the yard; dishes and clothes were washed; food was prepared while John took care of his family. It really taught me the admonition to love my neighbor as myself.

How are your community and neighbors doing? Do they stand in need? Some do. Go help them. If you see a lawn that needs attention, ask permission and give it some. If you know of someone who is hurting, give comfort. Strangers suffer too; offer assistance to them. As you pass people on the street, make their day, smile at them and offer a “hello.”

Maybe you are in a situation where you cannot offer aid or assistance, but you can be kind to those who aid you. Give a smile and a “thank you.” That is all the payment they ask; kindness.

Some think we shouldn’t expend our resources to aid the earthquake stricken country. Their argument is that the suffering entity should be self reliant enough to take care of their own. I will admit that there is some strength to that argument, but it's not right.

If we are a true world community, what happens to one, happens to us all. If someone in our community stumbles, all feel it, and lift that person up. It makes us all stronger. Kindness begins with me. Will you follow?

David Wilson Atwood is a local freelance writer whose human-interest columns offer a unique perspective. He may be e-mailed at david@starchasers.us.